Melt butter in a skillet over medium-high heat. Add in all vegetables and cook for 2-4 minutes to soften.
Pour in water and milk, and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and whisk in the grits. Cover and cook for 15 to 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Stir in cheddar cheese and Tony’s seasoning to taste. Keep grits on low until ready to serve. Add a little water at a time if grits start to dry.
Combine buttermilk, egg and hot sauce into a shallow bowl. On a separate plate, pour out the fish fry mix and stir in paprika. Dip catfish in buttermilk dredge and then coat in fish fry batter. Heat cooking oil in heavy bottomed skillet over medium heat. Once sizzling add in catfish to fry until golden brown. Set aside.
Combine first five buffalo sauce ingredients together in a skillet over medium low heat. Mix cornstarch and water together to make a slurry, and pour into sauce. Bring sauce to a brief boil while stirring, then down to low. Stir until sauce thickens.
Add a spoonful or two to the bottom of your serving dish. Top with grits and catfish. Brush tops of catfish with sauce. Garnish with fresh parsley and serve.